My Body

When I woke up yesterday, I immediately thought of places to go and eat. Nice fancy places. But as I lay in bed and recounted the stuff I wanted to accomplish this year and --gasp!-- into my 30's I was like, "Nah, I'm going to climb some shiii!"

Climb I did.

There's a Brooklyn Boulders (Queensbridge location) on my commute to Evangel. At least on my subway (and walking) commute. I've really wanted to go since discovering it.

I've climbed rock walls before, a 35-foot wall with harness, and a few 5-foot walls bouldering, so it wasn't too new. But that was in my teens and early 20's. My physical and mental strength have changed.

As a kid, I didn't take care of my body, eating junk food--American and Filipino, and drinking soda to excess. I remember eating nothing but Watermelon Airheads one summer. That was stupid and dangerous, I realize now. I wasn't any better as a teen, I was sleep deprived 80%, cranky, and emotionally unstable. I had an eating disorder as well. I'd eat and eat and get it out...

I resolved to be kinder to my body in my 20's. That I did. I established a better relationship with sleep, food, and body.

People often say that the body "heads south" starting 30. That may be true, but I think that it's a good challenge to take up and maintain. I feel like I'm finally in this headspace where I am kind to my body. I don't want to keep abusing it because eventually, it won't be mine, well, not really.

Eventually, it will hold another life (or lives?) and will be a guardian and nourishment for these lives.

How does bouldering factor into it? Well, it's a novel experience. It's proof that my mind and body are stronger now. It's not where I want it to be, but small victories count.

I've got a vision for where I want to be as a person. I'm loving this little adventure already.



2 Corinthians 5:17

Here and Now

The countdown to my birthday is ever alarming?--for the lack of a better term. It is the last birthday of my 20's, and thus, once I hit that magical year, the countdown to my 3rd decade commences. As always, introspection comes part-and-parcel.

The last year has been a daring one. I have learned to stretch in faith, and boy has it been crazy for me. There have been periods of waiting, then spurts of intense activity, and the tapering off of intensity, but greater activity.

People worry about my future for me. They worry about my career. My place--whether I will grow roots in a certain area. I can only shrug.

The last decade has changed me. I used to plan everything in my life. Dread the work it entailed, but planned it neatly, nonetheless. But dropping out of Pharmacy School; taking a year and a half to actually seek God for the next step, and doing what He said, has been an adventure.

I was so scared to trust God with my future. I was so scared to let go. Now, I've learned that letting it go is best. There are things I don't need in my life and I gladly relinquish that to Him. There are things I can't handle, and I gladly hand that over. I've learned to simply do what I need, and that's that.

As I count down the days to my 29th birthday, I count down the crazy things that have happened in the last 10 years. My personal growth; my wonder and wanderings, and the grace that has been poured out.

Below is a quote from the sermon of Pastor Dharius Daniels (from Stay Woke, the one I talked about previous post)

"You started sensing the rising to an allergic reaction to mediocrity and apathy."

Excellence and clarity are mine.

Proverbs 31:31

Details and Demarcation

As most of my followers on Instagram and friends on Facebook know, I am focusing on my art at the moment. I wanted to focus on music but I had to decide which one would be beneficial for me at present. Writing, too, has been put on the back burner--at least, posting my writing. I'm chugging along, daily, trying to write something.

I was listening to a successful artist speaking about talent and skill late last evening and he consolidated the nebulae of thoughts I had been ruminating the past few months. Too long and verbose to write here. Haha!

Anyway, I take comfort in knowing that I don't know much about art. I truly want to increase my skill because talent only takes me so far--like engenius and prodigious children, the other children catch up eventually. I will not depend on inspiration or muse(s) but simply do...and learn.

Today marks a shift in the way I do things. I hope you'll tune in for the adventure. My blog on WordPress will contain more artist musings and, dare I hope, artwork. 

Jude 1:24-25

Eventualities, praise and worship; if not now, when?

My friend and business partner never fails to say the phrase, "if not now, then when?" every time we speak. It is a good reminder of the lies we believe about our lives and the time we have on earth.

Lately, I have pondered the future, especially setting my goals for the next year. I was on the phone with a childhood friend--a girl I used to babysit, actually, and I tell her, " I am a year a half away from being 30. What would I have wanted to accomplish, then?"

The lies we often believe about our lives is that we have time. We actually do not. To get existential here, as I type this I am using the "present". As you will read these words, you will have read my "past" words while using your "present" moments. When you finish, I shall be in bed, asleep--it would be my "future" coming to pass.

Wednesday was the first time I led praise and worship. I have, for the better part of the last decade and a half, sang back up. It was a surreal moment when I stood in front of the congregation and we were in high worship. The thought occurred to me that my singing--the talents the Lord gave me were unused for the last long while. The enemy had succeeded in thwarting, diverting, and distracting me from utilizing these gifts. It's sad. But now, onward.

So, when will eventualities come to fruition?

Romans 12:6-8

NaNoWriMo day 6 - First kiss scene complete; Back home and Church

I had a productive weekend in Boston. I'm sad that I didn't get to stay a bit longer to attend church with my Revolution family. But I had to go back home to NY because I didn't want to miss our Sunday worship.

Our Sunday worships have been full of great nuggets of heaven. God is really revealing Himself to our congregation. Lots of encouraging, life-giving, and loving correction from Him. I really didn't want to miss the continuation of my sister's sermon.

Anyway, although I didn't reach the word count today, I did manage to write about 300+ words. I also completed the kiss scene between my two characters. Let's just say I let out a squeal when I wrote the last word. I cannot wait to develop their relationship.

I will take all the knowledge I amassed this weekend and use it to further my business and train others! MASTER FASTER! Yay!


Song of Solomon 1:1-4 (totally appropriate! LOL)

NaNoWriMo day 4 - Plot and Trip to Boston/Cambridge/Lowell

Today I didn't hit my target word count as I was traveling. Last night I only had 1.5 hours of sleep as my mom came home from the Philippines and then I was packing for my business trip. I missed my bus because there was construction. Thankfully the business meeting happens tomorrow morning!

Whatever I wrote today was a continuation of the characters that are falling in love. It's tricky because I want to "word vomit" all the things inside my head but it's jarring and that doesn't do the characters justice. However, I may be wrong in this. Nano is about writing quantity over quality. So I will try to carve out time tomorrow to finish this set and move on to the next vignette.

But really, young couple in love~~~

As for my trip, I am in Massachusetts for a Shaklee meeting with my business partner and her mom. Her mom is a senior representative. I am thankful for this opportunity to watch her in her element.

I was able to meet with my friend for dinner. We had B.Good burger which oddly enough has one of the best SALADS ever. The whole point of the company is sustainability and local food. I am addicted to their Southwestern salad, but today I got the Fall fruit salad, which is a savory salad--not the sweet kind. It's got pears, apples, figs, and candied walnuts on a bed of rocket. Love it!

I also go to eat my favorite ice cream, Toscanini's. My favorite flavors in order: Green tea, Earl Grey, Bourbon Vienna Finger, and Saffron. Today, I ordered the Bourbon Vienna fingers because Green tea and Earl Grey are staples.

Yay for old haunts!

Colossians 3:23

Short to Mid-range Goals, and Being A Steward of the Environment

Recently, I wrote a list of several things I wanted to accomplish within the next year, year and a half, two years, and five years. Some things include being financially free of all types of debt--consumer and educational. Then there are more personal things like weight and general wellbeing. Another thing I'd like to have within the short-range future is to get my Driver's Licence and get a car.

I still don't feel like I need it, living in NYC and all. However, the liberation and whimsy of road trips without taking the bloody bus--looking at you MegaBus--is edging toward the want. Having no private parking/driveway and to alternate parking regulations--the bane of anyone with a car in the city--does not excite me. AT. ALL.

Anyway, today, I've spent a great deal watching car reviews on YouTube. Namely, I was looking at Audi and Volvo SUV's. However, what piqued my interest was Tesla's Model X. 

As I sit watching Model X videos, I remember reading an article about "passive houses". Since Tesla's are known to be eco-friendly, I linked that to passive houses which are energy efficient. Basically, the house has minuscule heat and cold leakage. There'd be no need for heaters in the winter and air conditioners in the summer. I think this is cost effective for everyone in the long run, especially for the environment.

It dawned on me that I like this type of lifestyle. It is in line with what the Bible says about Man (humans, homo sapien sapien). Man is supposed to be a steward of the earth. However, we have grossly abused it. 

I'll continue to explore these thoughts. 

Image belongs to Tesla.com, Tesla Model X with its Falcon wings open. A bit ostentatious, but it goes well with me. I think its whimsy. Calling my Back to the Future peeps. 

Romans 8:22

New York, New York - A friend visits

Today, I was able to hang with a friend. She's come to visit from California, and it was a day filled with walking, talking, and laughing.

First, we met at Dominique Ansel's Bakery. Since both of us were hungry, we made our way to the Birdbath cafe. We had salad and Farfalle pasta. Then, we walked around SoHo for a bit; picture taking architecture and fanciful shop windows.

After SoHo, we walked to the New Museum. The contents of the exhibits are contemporary and abstract. I favored two installations. Namely, one with the hanging lights.

Thereafter, we walked to CW Pencil Enterprise. I bought two pencils and a sharpener. The shop is neatly organized, which is always a treat to behold. But I was glad my friend appreciated writing instruments as much as I do.

After CW Pencils, we made our way to Bryant Park where we had a snack and then walked through the Holiday Villiage. Some shops were set up and ready for the holiday sale season, whilst others were not set up. We went inside the Schwarzman building (NYPL main library) and took pictures. We marveled at the architecture and I was telling her about the history and the cool things I've come across whilst conducting research.

Finally, we walked to Harvard Club and rested our feet. I gave her a quick tour of the place and we continued to chat about life. It was a good way to end the vigorous day.

I hope to visit her in California soon, but with all the things I'm attempting to do--I'll continue to pray about it.

Proverbs 12:26

Changes - Endeavors and Lesson Planning

Yesterday, I went to my old High School to get paperwork done. I was to look over the workbooks I'd need to order to tutor ESL to international students. I met a fellow teacher and got to observe her and the class.

Today, I did the same thing. However, I focused on observing another teacher. There were differences in style between the two I observed. That was comforting. Seeing them handle their class gets me excited for my own! I can't wait for next week!

Anyway, as I chatted with the teachers, I got a sense that they, too, are feeling the new-ness of their position. The program we are a part of services the high school, and this year is the first time the program is offered during the school hours (it was previously an after school program). It's exciting as I find that we are malleable to the changes.

I think that's why people find it so hard to change, or accept change. The unknown is terrifying. Being unsure is terrifying. I suddenly remember a conversation I had with a guidance counselor in HS. I remember saying that I was so afraid of the future, that I'd rather relish the past.

I've grown up since then, and one of the lessons I've learned is to be excited for the future. When you hold on to the past, you don't see the future as brilliant, you often see it as daunting. But when you embrace the future, it's liberating because of all the potential.

I'm juggling the new position as a part-time ESL tutor with the new business. This is all new. This is exciting. But I'm getting to meet cool people. I'm creating great relationships with brilliant people. It reminds me of when I first started Harvard.

I remember then, I was so scared to sound stupid. But now, I know that everyone is learning something new. We're all sharing the same experience. Those who bring the negative energy only stifle themselves. When we have positive energy, we can share that, and together we all grow.

Super psyched for what the rest of the month unfolds. Further, what the end of the year entails. Yay!

2 Chronicles 16:9

Keep Your Heart -- Acknowledge your blessings, blast past negativity!

Today, I was able to encourage a friend. Actually, lately, because I've the time, I've been finding friends who need encouragement. Some have health scares, some have work woes, and others are broken hearted, by someone or a circumstance. I count it a privilege to extend my prayer and support with encouraging words.

The conversation with this young lady, today, helped me realize God's goodness in my life. I have friends who encourage me and build me up. They kick my butt in line so I can do better. I realize that, for some people, it is a fortune to have genuine friends who not only supports good endeavors but cautions and corrects.

When I spoke with another friend, I mentioned that we--because she and I are accountability partners--are fortunate to have each other. That God has caused us to grow in our respective fields. We strive for higher goals, together.

She just finished her PhD research project and is fixing her scientific paper for publishing. While I am endeavoring to build my small business. For some, these goals are but dreams, much more the action of accomplishing them is nearly impossible.

I count myself very humbled by God's grace, that He would entrust to me--us--such destinies.

My suggestion, dear readers, is to find good friends who enable you in the best way. They not only are your "hype"-wo/man but also the person to knock some sense into you. But know yourself first! Your identity isn't intertwined with theirs. You are you. You are awesome in your own right, you need them to help you realize how awesome you are all together.


Proverbs 4:23

Changes - Autumn

Autumn, is my favorite season. However, I dislike the first part of it--the fluctuation! The constant hot-cold weather change; being unsure of what to wear, and the humidity.

My skin often suffers between (major) seasonal changes. My mother finds it odd, but I can't do anything about it. The other season I also suffer is the Spring-Summer change. The humidity, and possibly the pollen in the air affects my skin too.

Anyway, I love Autumn and what it brings. Brightly colored trees, hearty vegetables and stews, and a slight chill in the air for sweaters, hats, and scarves. For the latter, I have a decent collection, and will take it out of storage.

I know Starbucks notes the change of the season into Fall when the Pumpkin Spice Latte comes out, but for me it's when I start cooking soups or roasting veggies. My favorite recipe is the cauliflower-potato-leek. CPL for short. Haha.

Ecclesiastes 3:1-8

Healthy, Slow, Minimalist Living

I think that the culture today is the exact opposite of the abovemebtioned. We are living an unhealthy, fast/busy, yet unproductive, over indulgent, malcontented lifestyles. And if anyone doesn't want to participate in that, they're branded as a "hippy", or "eco-snob".

Spiritually, I want to learn to be content, for contentment is a great gain. I want to be content with myself, my circumstances, my living, my posessions. I even want to venture out and say I want to learn to be more content with my relationships. I should be cultivating stronger bonds with people instead of seeking the next interesting person.

Hmm, all good things. Still haven't quite thought it through.

1 Timothy 6:6

Scent, Memories, and Fuzzy feelings

I think my obsession with scents began when I was around 8 or 10. There was a Rite Aid (pharmacy) by my old neighborhood that had a good selection of colognes and body sprays. Unlike other pharmacies, they had their selections open and not closed off behind a glass shelf.

I remember that my dad purchased me the Calgon - Turquois Seas spray. I practically bathed in it. Thereafter, I got CK One and Tommy Girl. In High School, I fell in love with Armani Emporio She. I also wore Dolche&Gabbana Light Blue, Dior J'Adore (mostly because my mom likes Dior and I'd use her's!), Armani Code Black, Demeter's Gin & Tonic (which is the cheaper version of Light Blue!). I particularly like Clean - Out of the Shower and Soap. I didn't care for the original scent.

I once purchased something from the UK and received a sample. I got Floris Cefiro and Fleur. So delicious...So bloody expensive.

My mainstay is definitely Emporio She. However, today, I may have found a new favorite! It's by Reiss, Black Oudh.

Funny story, I was touring our guest at the Oculus (train station/mall) by the World Trade. We passed through some shops and I had to stop. I thought the wafting scent was from a couple who passed by, but then I started to backtrack. The scent came from the shop.

I approached an unsuspecting sales associate. "What's that scent?!" He pointed toward the cashier, "It'll be there--Oud."

Another associate pointed to the bottle and I began playing with it. "It reminds me of this scent in a mall I went to in Dubai. I got off the escalator, and I was about 100 feet, and this powerful scent hits me." (to note, I was already smelling it two floors down!)

"Yeah, oudh is quite powerful. It's good this reminds you of it."

Indeed, the scent reminded me of a good time; of sunny skies, and perfect weather (LOL for that time. I am aware that Dubai is hell-hot thereafter!). I really did want to buy the Oudh there in Dubai, but then again, I didn't think my parents would appreciate me burning the wood at home. Haha.

I want to buy it. Right now I've got the sample paper tucked into my Bible. Yummy.


2 Corinthians 2:15-16

Mad Dash part 2 - Mom's Bibles

My mother is on the plane now, probably taxiing through the tarmac. It's been a whirlwind 5 hours.

She came home late from work. Had to get the rest of her packing done. Went to the airport late.

She was all nerves. I usually can tell when she's getting nervous. It's funny and albeit a bit frustrating.

The funniest part of checking in is that her carry-on luggage was 2x the weight allowed. When the clerk asked her to take stuff out, she zipped open the bag and then proceeded to take out two of the three Bibles therein. When weighed again, it was still overweight, so we took out the third Bible.

"Mom! Why do you have three Bibles?" I asked.
"Wha--? No, that one is Amplified!"
😂
You'd only understand if you know my mom...

Psalm 119:105

Mad Dash

Last minute laundry. Packing with mom when we get home. No sleep again tonight because I've got paperwork for my dad.

Such is the life of missionaries. Yay to adventure!

I am so excited for my mom to be heading out to the missions field. She's got a powerful message! I can't wait to hear all about it.

Woot!

Matthew 6:33

Thoughts After Church - Worshipping

I arrived at church late. It was half way into Worship when I settled in a seat. The first few songs I sang distractedly. Many thoughts were in mind.

There was this moment, where I repented for not focusing--for not being present. All of a sudden, I was able to worship. A great load came out of my mind and heart. It was freeing as well.

However, there was this other moment where I grew honest and scared. I realized that my life, in the grander scheme of things, is truly fleeting. I began to cry earnestly. I felt like, 'God, I've wasted so much time'. Also, thereafter that thought, 'what are the next 10, 20, 30 years if not but a bat of the eye.'

I remembered a sermon about Mary Magdalene who brought the Alabaster jar and anointed Christ's feet. Some scholars say that this jar with precious oils, costing much, was a nest-egg of sorts. She could have tucked it away for her future to sell or for her burial. But basically, it meant that she was giving her future--unknown, undefined, costly, and laying it at the feet of Jesus.

Amazingly, Jesus says to her detractors that her deed will forever be recorded wherever the Gospel is preached. So, in laying down her nest-egg, the only valuable tangible representation of her future at His feet, she gained so much more. Where she laid to rest her personal gain and glory at his feet, she, all of a sudden, is forever part of the glory and redemption of the Gospel.

I'm still ruminating what that means for me.

Matthew 26:13

Cleaning - minimalist lifestyle

One of my good friends and I have always admired the minimalist lifestyle. However, I don't exactly fit it in practice. I have a lot of stuff--I'm very blessed

Today has been about cleaning and clearing out my room. I envision a uncluttered area, but its an organized jigsaw right now. I am trying my best to keep things tidy.

I am making room on my desk/vanity for actual workspace. At the moment 2/3 of my desk is devoted to my makeup, which, while nice and organized leaves little room for paperwork.

I've got to shift things around in my shelf so I can move some make up there so it doesn't impede work flow. I've an office set up in mind, but I don't exactly want to put my makeup aside. I worked so hard earlier this year to get it all organized and tidy.

Here's to being 65% underway.

Philippians 4:12

Wanderlust - Where It Began

Being Filipino, I always knew someone who was abroad. Growing up and having family come to visit with souvenirs was a treat. They would have plenty of stories about distant lands and different cultures.

In addition, I was raised around foreigners. In Makati, Philippines, I saw Westerners and Asians, since it was the city center of the country's capital. Also, since my dad was an Evangelist/pastor, he had support from missionaries, namely, South Korean ministries/missionaries.

When I came to the US, we lived in a very diverse neighborhood, and the schools I attended reflected the population. It was great growing up with all these influences, i count myself very blessed.

But really, it was my grandfather who was a sailor. He sailed all over the world with his crew at a time where most societies were still segregated. He would tell stories about African, European, and Asian port cities and their misadventures.

My dad, too travels often. Even at a young age, I knew he would go to the provinces in the Philippines. And as I was growing up in the US, he would go back to the Philippines every year for a month or so at a time.

When I was sixteen, he began traveling to Europe for extended stays, first for a few months at a time, then up to six months. His travels always brought home great news about the churches in Europe, and the great things God was doing there.

Because of the internet, I had (and obviously still have) the privilage of meeting interesting people from all over the world. That's how I got to meet my friends in Dubai and South Korea. It's fantastic!

Traveling to the Philippines in 2008, and then to 11 countries in Europe 2009, really solidified that lifestyle. It helped me grow and expand my philosophies. It also gave me a heart for overseas workers. But more on this topic another time.

Travel just runs in my blood. I loved cultures, art, food, and people. I love stories. I want to amass stories for my children and grandchildren because I know the world will be a different place then.

Acts 1:8

Relief - Falling into Place

Today is a good day although the weather seems contrary. I've finally submitted the last pieces of paperwork for the teaching job, and I had my first order for a Shaklee turnaround! Happy dance!

The walk toward my goal is long, but today is something to celebrate because God is good. I'm a firm believer that victories, no matter how small, should be acknowledged and celebrated. The adage 'fortune favors the bold' has been in mind lately, and I can't help but think that patience and prayers through the last few weeks have lead me here. Seemingly insignificant, but I cannot help but think of the Jesus and his parable of the mustard seed. 

A friend slept over last night, but before sleeping, we were talking (as I did the dishes). I was talking about my activities the last few weeks, and what I'm doing with the time I have for myself. I've also shared the renewed passion I have for mentoring, and how I'm finally working out my ministry.

She mentioned that couldn't help but smile as I recounted the last few weeks. And in addition, other close friends have noticed how 'chill' I am with all these changes. I always attribute the peace to the prayers.

A few posts below, I mentioned that I am interested in the slow living--living intently--and that the philosophy of one of my favorite chef's is "Time is an ingredient". I've been through circumstances that have stretched my faith these past few years. I'm just learning to rest and change my flow.

Things are settling down, and now the praying and the planning these few weeks can take effect. Soon more victories, in different forms, will come. I can't wait to celebrate those too.

Hebrews 12:2

Sunrise at Burj Khalifa observation deck

Slow Living - The Lie of the Rat-Race

Today, I was able to meet up with an old friend. I had not interacted with her for more than a decade. We enjoyed bunch at Qdoba, and talked about our respective businesses. I had a nice time.

Thus far in the recent re-direction of my life, I am enjoying the "free-er" time that I have. It is the opposite of when I worked for someone else, where I would be so tired I'd "nap" (ie sleep!) after I got home. However, I also attribute my increased energy to the shake and vitamins I've been taking for my turnaround. After the nap, I went to church. Happy times!

Digressing, I love the slower life style I have right now, and to be honest, I've always admired my friend Susie who runs the blog Oreeko (Oreeko on FB). She runs a blog and directory (!!!) on slow living. I always thought it was lovely to live that way.

Slow living, I think is great because one lives intentionally. Time is yours. The lie of the rat race is that the things on your list must be accomplished, but really, things take time!

Another tangent: that's why I love Dominique Ansel so much. I love the concept of the Dominique Ansel Kitchen [where] "Time is an ingredient"

Here's a few things I've learned: There are things one should not force. (Certain) Big decisions take time. Life is to be enjoyed. There's no point to being miserable with something you can change. Living the life you want takes courage and sacrifices.

I hope that from here on out, I live intentionally. That I use my time wisely. I am accountable, right?

Psalm 90:12