Change of perspective and radio silence

November kicked my ass. I had several disappointments and I promptly learned from them. I was learning, stretching, and growing.

A quick writing update: I wrote a few things after I stopped blogging last month. I was disappointed in that. Something came up which demoralized me and impeded my creativity. However, once I fixed this, and started to think about the story--the universe I was creating; my characters and their circumstances, I felt that thrill and life return to me.

Additionally, I finally began to teach. I had quit my job at T&Co, early/mid-September, but with bureaucratic red tape, I wasn't able to start teaching until the 2nd week of November. It was also testing because, after that, I had Thanksgiving and holiday-related no-class sessions.

As for the business, I grew it a little bit and I am very happy to be pushing onward. I was able to close in and welcome a new business partner. It was great! When my days at the school had me feeling bummed out, I would look forward to sharing positive energy with my business colleagues.

December's outlook: after re-evaluating my disappointments, I know this is the time to change tactics. I've created a great schedule and calendar. Which helps me track and "number my days", yet, not feel overwhelmed. I've formatted my schedule for my novel--alas, I didn't get to finish because I started teaching--which I hopefully will finish by the end of January-to-mid-February.

I keep all this in prayer. I'm living for my legacy.


Matthew 10:16

NaNoWriMo day 4 - Plot and Trip to Boston/Cambridge/Lowell

Today I didn't hit my target word count as I was traveling. Last night I only had 1.5 hours of sleep as my mom came home from the Philippines and then I was packing for my business trip. I missed my bus because there was construction. Thankfully the business meeting happens tomorrow morning!

Whatever I wrote today was a continuation of the characters that are falling in love. It's tricky because I want to "word vomit" all the things inside my head but it's jarring and that doesn't do the characters justice. However, I may be wrong in this. Nano is about writing quantity over quality. So I will try to carve out time tomorrow to finish this set and move on to the next vignette.

But really, young couple in love~~~

As for my trip, I am in Massachusetts for a Shaklee meeting with my business partner and her mom. Her mom is a senior representative. I am thankful for this opportunity to watch her in her element.

I was able to meet with my friend for dinner. We had B.Good burger which oddly enough has one of the best SALADS ever. The whole point of the company is sustainability and local food. I am addicted to their Southwestern salad, but today I got the Fall fruit salad, which is a savory salad--not the sweet kind. It's got pears, apples, figs, and candied walnuts on a bed of rocket. Love it!

I also go to eat my favorite ice cream, Toscanini's. My favorite flavors in order: Green tea, Earl Grey, Bourbon Vienna Finger, and Saffron. Today, I ordered the Bourbon Vienna fingers because Green tea and Earl Grey are staples.

Yay for old haunts!

Colossians 3:23

NaNoWriMo day 3 - Flow, and Falling in Love

Today, I didn't have much time or energy to write. I think I only wrote about 400+ words. I'm okay with this.

Succinctly, my mother is home from the Philippines and so we readied the house for her. My sister and I divided and conquered cleaning the house. I also did other errands.

Anyway, on the writing front, I was so excited writing the little bit I did. I had this section in mind since Wednesday. I was smiling ear to ear for my characters. One of my main protagonists is falling in love with a secondary character. It's endearing.

My sister's best friend walked in on me as I was squeeing with glee as I was typing. I love it! These are the scenes that push the story on.

I'm headed to Massachusetts in a few hours so I'm going to write as much as I can before sleep and then head out.


Song of Solomon 3:5

NaNoWriMo day 2 - Pace

Today's pace was slow. I was falling back into my habit of researching. I lost time.

I also lost time for my counter. I guess people were trying to upload their word counts before 12am, that the site was slow. So I technically got my 3345 wordcount in at 12am, having gotten locked out. Sigh.

Better pacing tomorrow! A better blog tomorrow. I got tuckered out. Haha!

Hebrews 12:2

NaNoWriMo Day 1 and a small surprise

I have uploaded my first day's word count at 1,704 words. It is a little over the projected daily word count, 1,667. I am quite excited. I was in a groove. However, I wanted to stop so I can write this blog.

The current writing set up is quite simple. My Dyson heater-fan to my right, for optimal temperature; the ultrasonic humidifier with essential oils is on with peppermint and frankincense (way to keep awake and focused without coffee). I also have guacamole and chips for snack.

I got my first mini-writer's block with some dialogue, so I went and cooked some oatmeal. Did I ever mention that I cook when anxious or need to think? I also walk, but I did that this after noon after my first writing session.

At the moment, I have 4 hours a day I can allocate for writing. To lessen on fatigue and frustration, I decided to break that into 2 sessions. Two hours in the morning right after I wake, and two hours in the evening after dinner.

I've allocated time for blogging, which is not part of the daily word count. Likewise, I picked up a side project for someone at church.

Finally, the surprise of the day, is that someone wants me to part-time for them as a grant writer. If writing in this season isn't meant to be, then I don't know! But I know it's a good thing.

I'm in a state of flow. I'll continue writing after this blog.

Proverbs 15:13

NaNoWriMo - Prep and Plot

I just received my "No Plot? No Problem" book by Chris Baty, the founder of NaNoWriMo. Thank you, Amazon Prime. I'm quite pleased with what I've read thus far.

He talkes about the excitement that happens at the onset of the endeavor. Then the waning of the excitement, and by the last week it's an arduous endeavor. Thankfully, the novel doesn't have to be 100% done by means of plot or characterization, but rather, one can celebrate accomplishing at 50,000 words.

The way I've set it up is a series of vignettes, so each character contributes to the whole narrative. There will be plot holes, definitely, as vignettes don't warrant a continuous time line. But who knows?

The key here is to get to 50,000 words, and hopefully have a story worth telling. Then the revisions start. Here is where all the questions on plot, characterization, and over all style has to be settled.

I remember attempting all this before and I would waste time because I needed a certain detail to be right, correct, or real. However, Chris writes in his book that this whole exercise--marathon--is to get as much on paper/written, it's quantity over quality. Quality takes time, and that can happen after the month is over.

Here's to the next few days in mentally preparing for the challenge!

Habakuk 2:2

Review - Shaklee Effect: Living my best life now

It has been a month and a half since I left my previous job. I stepped out in faith and drew upon that much courage. My business is coming along, although the part-time position teaching is still tied up in bureaucracy. I am happy and healthy and that's all that matters.

I was talking with my friend and business partner today about our company and the opportunities it gave us. And in tying up the decision to participate in NaNoWriMo, I told her about it. I told her about this passion I've had for so long.

See, NaNoWriMo, is a writing marathon that happens in the month of November. The object is to "sprint" writing a novel--actually, a novella--that is, 50,000 words. When I was younger, I was very active in fandoms and fanfiction. I was active in several writing communities and fansites as well. I wrote blogs in Live Journal and Xanga (before that!).

My contemporaries and mentors always encouraged me to write a novel. They believed that I was capable of it. However, the timing for NaNoWriMo was never quite right. When I was in school, it went along with finals time, and when I was working, it was around the busiest time of the year. Also, when I was working (for someone else, so to speak) I was so drained of energy that I was too tired to be creative.

Writing well requires a bit of drudgery. It requires practice. It requires a lot of focus and patience. I didn't have that when I was in school or working a conventional job.

So, in the conversation earlier, I thanked my friend for seeing the potential in me to be a part of the business. The Shaklee Opportunity is allowing me to live my best life now! I am living a deliberate lifestyle and finding creative ways to spend my time. I am building and strengthening relationships. I have energy, purpose, and time.

I've lost a bit of fat and gained muscle mass. My skin problems have cleared. My mindfulness and mindset are all the more being reinforced for positivity and opportunity instead of seeing my lack.

I thank God for this opportunity. He says that we are the head and not the tail. I wholeheartedly believe in that. I can't wait! My transformation and continues.


Before                               After

Excellence.MyShaklee.com
Shaklee Life Plan for complete Macro and Micro nutrition

Deuteronomy 28:13

Bible Study - Apologetics: On Free Will and Choice

Today, we had a lovely and lively discussion about Biblical foundations. There were questions and answers, and there were things to further seek God for clarity.

One of the topics was about Angels having free will. I, in my limited study, do not know the whole picture, nor am I fluent in philosophical and theological jargon. So I will seek and pray.

Thus far, all I know is that there is a difference between free will and free choice. Words and how they are defined could help shed light on the matter. But mostly, it is to the Holy Spirit to inspire and teach.

This is the crux of the matter. It is to seek God and find out his truth. To read, seek, delight, and become enlightened.

Proverbs 25:2

Trying to Understand this Election Cycle

There is too much noise. There are too many platitudes spoken. Too many empty promises.

I am a conservative with liberal leanings. That makes me on the moderate side of things. There are issues I am steadfast in my opinion, and other issues--some important to others--that I am on the gray.

I stand for life, but I believe we all have a choice.

I believe in foreign aid, but I also believe America needs to fix itself.

I believe that both of the candidates are self-serving. 

I believe the people for either side are myopic in their stances at best.

I'm praying for this country. I suggest we all do too.

1 Timothy 2:1-3

Super Saturday - Schlepping Myself to Mt. Kisco

Today, I attended my first Regional Event for Shaklee. Super Saturday, they call it. One of the key speakers is Les Wong, who has been with the company for (about) 40 of the corporation's 51 years.

Let me begin by saying this: I woke up at 4 blood AM so as to not miss the 7 train to the City. But because I didn't want to walk to the subway, I took an Uber to the Grand Central for the Metro North. I arrived earlier than needed--a whole three hours early. I was taken aback by the temperature, it was fridged, winter-like.

I met up with my business partners and we drove to the location. I got meal bars and got to sample other products. Yummy.

I am super proud to be a part of a health and wellness company that has a history. Their products are scientifically and rigorously tested--127 peer-reviewed and presented studies! The first product, which has evolved in different iterations for specific health needs, is over 100 years old.

I want to be a part of that legacy!

Having used the products for a few years before dedicating myself to the business, I completely stand behind it. I can't wait to let more friends know about it. Health is wealth after all, and I don't want people I know, respect, and love, ailing from preventable diseases.

For my readers--if you feel that you've not the energy, or want a life change, I implore you, give Shaklee a chance. You will feel the difference. Energy. Happiness. Vitality. Then it'll be a cycle of positivity!

If you want, my website is: excellence.myshaklee.com Experience the Shaklee Excellence with me! I'm on my turnaround--health and wellness journey. Commit to one month!

I love my Shaklee family. Super supportive, open, and great energy! I love what I do, and I love the goals I'm on my way to accomplishing!
Feel free to ask me more questions. My contact is within the website, or PM me. 😃

Proverbs 17:22

Recalibrating

Yesterday, I was talking about focusing my energies. Today, begins implementation.

I spent the better part of the day preparing and finding reinforcements for the healthy habits I'm creating. This is about consistency after all. Exciting!

First phase, bed time. Second, phase, working hours. Third, phase diet. Fourth phase, workout. Final phase, repeat.

Also, I'm finding more creative ways of getting my business out there. Here's to more planning, development, and execution.

Psalms 37:7

Countdown to first fitness goal

Sigh, 29 days to my first fitness goal. Just being clear and envisioning it. I know I can focus!

This week has been hard with little sleep. Today, I'll try and sleep early. No more coffee or teas for me.

How bad do I want this goal? Badly. I've got to brainstorm how to get in more activity. I need to the change of weather, too.

All is well. I will sacrifice Instagramming during this time in order to focus on this goal. I always believe in loosing something to gain something.

Philippians 4:13

On Healing - A Journey & Encouragement

Last year, about this time, I was hired full-time by my previous job. However, two weeks into training, I hurt my foot, specifically my toe, and couldn't walk. I was embarrassed and angry with myself.

While on medical leave, I was just angry and terrible to myself. I felt stupid, and frustrated that something so silly kept me from working. I was embarrassed because I had just started in that department. I kept praying for healing and was frustrated that it didn't happen instantaneously.

However, one evening, as I lounged with my foot propped up, I felt something inside. I heard the Holy Spirit speaking to me. I felt my heart changing.

See, our body is the Temple of God; He resides within us, ready to commune with Him and do His work. However, we often neglect it too. I, in my frustration, was cursing my own body for not healing quickly. I was harboring negativity about the situation. The nudge of the Spirit caused me to see this.

If we are to speak life to others, we should speak life to ourselves. "Death and life is in the power of the tongue," Proverbs 18:21, so calling ourselves ugly, fat, worthless, and broken, is profaning the Temple of God. It is contrary to everything He has made us to be. 

So, at that point, I repented for the awful way I spoke to myself. I renounced all the anger inside. I renounced insecurity for good measure. Then, I spoke the promises of God. I am His righteousness. I am free. I am redeemed. I am healed. I am loved. I am accepted.

To this, I have learned to treat my body right. I try to get good quality sleep. I try to eat healthy. I try to exercise. I try to stay away from habits or actions that may cause old injuries to get agitated. However, I've got to move away from 'try' to 'do'. 

I challenge anyone reading: Repent for seemingly innocuous words/descriptions--"I'm fat", "I'm ugly", "I'm stupid", "I'm bad at...", "I don't know any better..." This is not who you are or who you're meant to be. You're meant to have an abundant life--and fat means you're abundantly blessed with food! Working out may be necessary, but you're blessed with sneakers to run, or money for a gym membership! Accept the fullness of His Grace in Jesus--accept that yes, we're not perfect, but we are unique for a purpose. Our experiences and lessons are nuggets of heaven to share with others.

God gives (multiple) second chances. He allows us to live life, and when we focus on this blessing; we see His goodness. We start seeing the grander plan. We see order from all the chaos of the past and present. We see a clearer vision of a better future.

James 1:17

Time Management and the Curse of Flexibility

Time management: this is one of my many failings. I add that flexibility is a curse because, too often, it goes hand-in-hand with poor time management. And no, I don't believe there is such thing as a "work-life balance", but more on that in a bit.

It is ingrained in me to be 'flexible'. Whether it is a facet of the Filipino culture, or that it is heavily prized in my family culture, I am not certain. Personally, I treat it as a bad habit.

I have tried schedulers and calendars--not the same thing!--I'm a 'lister' so lists are good for me. But try as I might, I do not get to cross off everything on that list. It annoys me.

Case in point, yesterday evening (early this morning, rather) I was listing down what I needed to do for today. However, something happened when I woke up that needed attention. While that matter was important, I am now looking at my list. The will to accomplish it diminishes. 

However, I've got to learn to manage my 'work-life', seeing that I'm part-timing as a tutor/teacher, and I've a business to run. I've to learn to focus, prepare, and make contingencies. Honestly, I can plan but my intentions may not be right, therefore, what looks good on my list, I may not follow through. That statement makes little sense, but it does to me. 

Anyway, affirmations:  I will focus. I will do what is on my list. I want to do this.

As I wrote yesterday, Proverbs 16:9, I plan, but God fulfills. I'll just do my work and thank Him for the energy.

Psalms 103:1

That Thing Called Hope

The job hunt is still very real. I don't wish to say that its a struggle because it really isn't. It's people's job to make sure to pick the most qualified, and I get that. So, as I keep on pushing my resume out there, I remember a very old sermon--probably about 10 years ago--by my best friend's father.

"Cast thy bread upon the waters: for thou shalt find it after many days." Ecclesiastes 11:1 (KJV)

The other versions say to cast my "grain", and I understand that it can be also paraphrased as "seeds". It's also like saying "giving a gift can open doors; it gives access to important people!" (Proverbs 18:16 NLT). My skills, abilities, and positive characteristics are seeds (or gifts) that I have gathered/gained from planting effort and experiences, and by paying it forward/sowing over the summer, I know that it will indeed come back to me, or make room for me.

This is what I've been thinking about regarding this position I really desperately want. It's a clerical job in the back end operations of a very prestigious company. I would either work in shipping, customer service in drafting important documentation, or handling very precious materials for repairs. 

Here's hoping. Right?

Then, I was thinking about where I should "hope". Realistically, I need a job because I've got bills (student loans) to pay. Further, I need another degree or certification for a career. But then a job isn't permanent, and a career isn't secure. Money isn't permanent either. So, where to place hope?

I had said a small prayer as I was walking around the other day: "Jesus, you're my hope. I know this. You're doing something in the background for me." The hope that is sure is the cross of Jesus and what was done there. That remains constant because the price of life--my life--was paid by His blood. At the cross is my future as well.

I wait with anticipation; growing deeper in my knowledge and hope in Christ for the great things he has in store. I know Jesus is in the midst of it all and I know He's doing more in the background for my favor. The Holy Spirit is with me, guiding me to make the right decisions, and placing me decisively for the blessings that will over flow. 

I can't wait for the favorable outcome!

For Who You Are by Hillsong

How to Deal with Disappointment

It's nearly a month since my last post. I had originally planned to do a post every other day, but the job hunt is real and it's getting ever more real. I can't help but feel frustrated, and the feeling of despondency is slowly tugging. So, I am writing because I need to remember...

During camp last, one of the very first life issues God highlighted was that I had a lot of hurt and emotional scars. I can only side eye that, because, well, God knows me better than I know myself, right? I've been hurt by people closest to me--I mean, who hasn't? Thats one of the saddest facts of humanity, the closer you are to a person, the more hurt you'd feel--the amount of love you give is (often) proportionate to the amount of hurt you feel...

Digressing, emotional scars and hurts were remembered. A good portion was prayed over, released forgiveness for, and then prayed life into. For some, I actually had to contact the person(s) and release forgiveness--again, proportionate amount of hurt, it was a boatload. 

I just needed to remember this example of personal growth over the summer because I am feeling all these yucky feelings--excuse the lack of a better term. I'm hurt by the circumstances, and disappointed in myself. I feel like I've failed at life (already? I mean, I just graduated...), and that I've been hoodwinked. 

They are lies of the enemy.

Taking a cue from my favorite book in the Bible--James--I will combat these feelings with the Truth. I am content in this trial because its building perseverance (James 1:2, 9, 12 ). I am taking pride in my humble position, because in my lack, God overflows with all things I do not have. I am called to persevere because God has work for me to do.

Pastor Glenn Garland said something that I've been ruminating lately. My present situation may be fact--my current joblessness is likened to water turning into ice, but the TRUTH is that I am a conqueror and a success likened to aberrations of nature (miracles), like Jesus walking on water. 

My life is a miracle. This is my testimony. I will triumph because of the Blood Christ shed on the cross, and my testimony (Revelations 12:11). (Thank you Lord for such a beautiful thing!) The life in me is not mine, it is Christ's, therefore I have hope, and a bright future (recall Jeremiah 29:11).

Biblical truths.
Promises.
Endurance.


This is not the end.

This is how to deal with disappointments, despondency, and hurt life metes out. As my father likes to quote: Hebrews 12:2, "Looking unto Jesus the author and finisher of our faith; who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is set down at the right hand of the throne of God."


This is Not the End by Gungor

Oceans (Where Feet May Fail) by Hillsong United

Oceans Will Part by Hillsong